i just went to a scare house with my friend and most of the time i just screamed like “fuck” or “shit” when i got scared but one time this guy came out of fucking nowhere and I screamed “WALRUS VAGINA” at the top of my lungs and the actor just lost it
did you know it takes at least a year to grow a pineapple so if you’re holding a pineapple and a newborn baby you might as well eat the baby because they have to respect their elders
last night was rough
so you’re telling me there’s an alien who regenerates into a completely random form, that he cannot control or determine himself, and who understandably could take millions of different appearances, but who all 13 times just turned into a different skinny white guy
when you hold a boy’s dick you hold all of their power. they are powerless. you can either give them an orgasm or destroy them.
i wish there was a non-assholeish way to say “our friendship has run its course, you make me uncomfortable with your feelings and a lot of shit you do pisses me off bye”